Loss as gain.

It's no secret to those close to me that I've recently had a, ahem, falling out with someone I held close to me for the past few years.

I valued this person a lot - putting aside the majority of my free time and emotional bandwidth to spend time with her. Last weekend, I finally received the straw that broke the camel's back. You can only be told so many times that you're selfish, that you're using someone and that you're shallow so many times before you call "shenanigans" and give up with your hands in the air.

I had simply had enough.

Her favorite line was that "she knew people." The unfortunate thing was that she didn't have a clue who I was. She saw what she wanted to see, needed to see, to validate her personal issues. The fact was that she, for whatever reason, needed to feel as though she had the moral high ground at the expense of others.

It's been hard, the past few days, without my sounding board. But I also feel refreshed and invigorated, as though a large wet and depressing blanket has suddenly been lifted off of me. I'm free to make choices based on what's good for me, to explore relationships with people that had been previously limited, and to be myself without fear of being called something I'm not.

Perhaps sometimes losing something can set you free.

In other news, there is nothing hotter than a man on your back. Especially when he's growling in your ear about how difficult it is not to rip you to shreds and hurt you. I love that it takes such control to not act in such a passionate and animalistic fashion, and I appreciate that his control was able to make it past the ten minute mark before waning and scraping my flesh.

My flesh appreciates it too.